Author: Steve Crum
Worth 1,000 Words: JIMMY DURANTE & GENE AUTRY on the set

By Steve Crum
Republic Pictures chose to increase the budget on one of its GENE AUTRY movies, and hired a pretty bizarre cast for any western, JIMMY DURANTE and ANN MILLER among them. Released in 1940, MELODY RANCH became one of Gene’s biggest box office successes. It was later considered culturally significant by the Library of Congress, and is now preserved in the United States Film Registry.
The plot has Gene Autry, portraying radio and movie cowboy star Gene Autry (a stretch), returning to his Arizona hometown (Gene was actually raised in Oklahoma, so this is a stretch) where he restores law and order while starring in his own radio show. Others in the cast include Barton MacLane, Barbara Jo Allen (better known as Vera Vague on the Bob Hope radio show), and Gabby Hayes, venerable sidekick to Roy Rogers as well as Gene. Durante’s character is Cornelius J. Courtney. Inka Dinka Do.
The rare Republic publicity still (top) is unique in several ways. When in the history of Durante did you ever see him on horseback and sporting cowboy boots? (His horse doesn’t look any too happy with him yelling and waving his hat. Notice the steed’s ears are pointed back.) That is Gene Autry himself–at least his back–headin’ toward his trailer on Champion, World’s Wonder Horse. The caption pasted on the photo’s backside explains: “At last, here I am at the peak of me power, ha-cha-cha!!” Jimmy “Schnozzle” Durante cheers as he successfully reaches the deck of the tamest horse in the Gene Autry stable. “What a man! What a cowboy! Where’s me rope and gun!” Durante clanked a mean spur with Autry and Ann Miller in “MELODY RANCH” at Republic Pictures. In the background here is Autry heading into his stable trailer. [from Steve Crum’s showbiz memorabilia collection]Worth 1,000 Words: RICKY NELSON & TRACEY GOLD

By Steve Crum
Significant as RICKY NELSON’S last appearance on either TV or film, 1981’s CBS-TV Movie, A TALE OF FOUR WISHES (originally broadcast Nov. 8, 1981) headlined Ricky along with future Growing Pains star TRACEY GOLD. Rick (then billed as such) portrayed Skeeter. Tracey was Jane, a girl who learns important lessons from her grandfather after wishing for more.
Dream-based ‘Inception’ boggles eyes, mind
By Steve Crum
That specialized unit, like most fictional units (think The A-Team, Leverage, and even The Great Escape trappings), is composed of not only experts, but experts with nicknames. There is Arthur aka “The Point Man,” well played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt. He and Cobb go way back, and are trusted friends and co-dreamers. Cobb plans the job, Arthur organizes the details. Ellen Page is Ariadne, “The Architect,” who designs and builds places that do not exist. THE visual highlight of Inception is Ariadne’s creation of a huge city that literally folds up onto itself. One can walk to the end of the street, up a wall with buildings and people intact, and continue strolling upside-down, gravity free. It must be seen to be appreciated, and believe me, you will appreciate it. Worth 1,000 Words: JOLSON, RATOFF & DARNELL at Fox
On the set of 1939’s HOTEL FOR WOMEN (20th Century Fox), featuring 16 year-old LINDA DARNELL in her first starring role, a sharply suited AL JOLSON visits both Darnell and her director, GREGORY RATOFF. Jolson had recently finished his own Fox film, ROSE OF WASHINGTON SQUARE, in which he starred with Alice Faye and Tyrone Power. Both Rose and Hotel were directed by Ratoff. That chain leading to Ratoff’s right pocket might be connected to the infamous whistle he often blew for effect while directing. [from Steve Crum’s showbiz memorabilia collection]
Rethinking, recasting ‘Eclipse,’ a saga unto itself
By Steve Crum
Amazing what a screening of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse and eating linguini after 10 p.m. can conjure. That night was filled with a monaural, full blown Hollywood horror-romance story in vivid Black and White analog. Being a child during the 1950’s, I flashed back to simpler, Legion of Decency-driven days when rock and roll was just beginning to shake, and relatively bloodless monster movies ruled.
The inspired casting:
ELVIS PRESLEY……Edward Cullen (replacing Robert Pattinson)
NATALIE WOOD……Bella Swan (replacing Kristen Stewart)
STEVE “Hercules” REEVES……Jacob Black (replacing Taylor Lautner & pecs)
Between tossing and turning in my non-sleep-adjustable bed, the nightmarish scenario developed…
Bella (Natalie Wood, in her Splendor in the Grass period) once again finds herself surrounded by danger as the San Fernando Valley is ravaged by a string of mysterious killings as Tuesday Weld’s malicious vampire continues her quest for revenge. In the midst of it all, Bella is forced to choose between her love for the loose hipped, guitar strumming blood sucker Edward Cullen (Elvis Presley, in his Jailhouse Rock days) and her friendship with an older, black bearded, and sublimely muscled older man, a werewolf in so many ways, Jacob Black (Steve Reeves), whose English is dubbed on the soundtrack. Bella must decide to either be with her avowed love Edward, and thus be transformed into a teenage vampire, or run with Jacob’s hairy pack of full moon rising werewolves. Either choice is a pain in the neck.
Meanwhile, a war is coming. It will be the vampirish Cullens teamed in an unholy alliance with Jacob’s band of wolf men versus a bunch of hungry, homeless, newborn vampires en route from Oakland. The newborns (Sal Mineo, Tab Hunter, Jamie Farr, Dennis Hopper, and Mercedes McCambridge among them) track the scent of Bella blood, while the Edward-Jacob alliance vows to protect their fair, air-headed, typically adolescent, and hormone inducing heroine.
The relationship between Bella and her two predatory boyfriends, Edward and Jacob, is more than a match. It is a cigarette lighter.
At this juncture, I woke up in heavy sweat, took a Tums, and turned on TV for return to normalcy. There was Taylor Lautner in a remake of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. He was Buffy, and topless! I turned off the set, and popped two more Tums.
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